Friday
Dec222006
alien conspiracy theory
Friday, December 22, 2006 at 02:11AM
I'm surrounded by conspiracy theorists. A couple of my really good friends land squarely in this category. And that's a good thing. Or at least a really entertaining one. My friend Billy Cerveny feeds on this. We all joke that he might be in the CIA, but I'm pretty sure Cason really thinks he is. Casella's on the fence. So Billy always does and says weird, mysterious things that get them going. I love it.
Now, this isn't exactly a conspiracy, but it's a pretty great theory. My friend Kevin Twit told me this one, and I think I might even agree.
I was reminded of the theory because we gave Sadie a bath tonight. She's so tiny, now just over 8 pounds, and she doesn't do a whole lot besides sleep (in the day, of course) so she doesn't need them too often. Basically, we just cover her up in a towel, expose a tiny part, wash it, and move on to the next one. It's cute to see how little she is, and she gets all squirmy.
Now, Kevin's theory is related to this. The brain of a newborn is so undeveloped, as far as memory and association go, that they have no idea what they're seeing, and they can barely see anyway. At first they just see black and white, then red, then other colors follow. This is why toys for tiny babies have a lot of black and white on them.
The theory goes that some people's brains spit up memories of their birth, or early life, and the memories are filtered through how they think now. The bright lights, probes (thermometers?), faces that look like this...
The mind tries to make sense of it, put the barely visible details (and a healthy appreciation for Star Trek) together and: voila! Alien abduction.
Random, I know, but I always thought it was interesting, or at least comical. So, there you go.
Also, doing a Google Image search for "alien head" reminds me of three very important things:
1. The movie Alien was really, really freaking awesome.
2. So was Aliens (the sequel).
3. Seeing people's "alien" artwork (and tattoos) reminds me of just how weird some people are.
And now, I'm going to try to get a bit of sleep while both babies are conked out and quiet. Happy Friday.
Now, this isn't exactly a conspiracy, but it's a pretty great theory. My friend Kevin Twit told me this one, and I think I might even agree.
I was reminded of the theory because we gave Sadie a bath tonight. She's so tiny, now just over 8 pounds, and she doesn't do a whole lot besides sleep (in the day, of course) so she doesn't need them too often. Basically, we just cover her up in a towel, expose a tiny part, wash it, and move on to the next one. It's cute to see how little she is, and she gets all squirmy.
Now, Kevin's theory is related to this. The brain of a newborn is so undeveloped, as far as memory and association go, that they have no idea what they're seeing, and they can barely see anyway. At first they just see black and white, then red, then other colors follow. This is why toys for tiny babies have a lot of black and white on them.
The theory goes that some people's brains spit up memories of their birth, or early life, and the memories are filtered through how they think now. The bright lights, probes (thermometers?), faces that look like this...
The mind tries to make sense of it, put the barely visible details (and a healthy appreciation for Star Trek) together and: voila! Alien abduction.
Random, I know, but I always thought it was interesting, or at least comical. So, there you go.
Also, doing a Google Image search for "alien head" reminds me of three very important things:
1. The movie Alien was really, really freaking awesome.
2. So was Aliens (the sequel).
3. Seeing people's "alien" artwork (and tattoos) reminds me of just how weird some people are.
And now, I'm going to try to get a bit of sleep while both babies are conked out and quiet. Happy Friday.
Reader Comments (9)
Just over 8 pounds now? Yikes, my second daughter was an ounce shy of 10 pounds when she was born. Thank you for giving me a new appreciation for my wife!
That's an interesting theory about alien abduction.
i love that theory. very nice.
a real quote from cerveny:
"death is a sign of weakness."
who says that!? only a CIA agent.
weird.
I'm a conspiracy theorist myself..... don't get me started on how we've never been to the moon.
Breathing in.
Breathing out.
Breathing in.
Breathing out.
Don't know about the alien abduction theory, but I definitely agree with your three very important things. My dog is named Ripley.
Merry Christmas!
I buy that theory. Two words: rectal thermometer.